Death to social media

I know people are going to think I’m exaggerating what I’m about to say but turning thirty changed my outlook on social media completely. Myspace was my social media introduction like most. Even all the way back in 2007 social media was a problem for me. The person was involved with (my oldest daughters father) hated my top 10 and all my photos. After him and I split his new girlfriend used social media as a means to harass and bother me even though I had clearly moved on with my life.

After that debacle, I jumped on facebook and again I started running into problems.  The first thing was my boyfriend at that time was mad at me cause I didn’t post pictures of us. I will say I did have pictures of other guys I dated previously but he knew why I didn’t post pictures and still got offended. Right after that came his online fan club of ex’s who just couldn’t let go. Then I fell into the trap of venting all my business to the world.

Now we’re in the Instagram age and nothing has changed. If you’re not starting the drama someone is trying to drag you into it. People swear that every meme you post has something to do with them cause their conscience eats them alive. People have always stolen pictures and now they take your kids pics. People who want to hurt others use their online presence to intimidate or slander people.

So many people are losing marriages and families because they can’t fight off the temptation social media can bring. My conclusion is if it’s not making me money I don’t need it honestly. I mean really how happy are you if you post every damn thing you do? When I’m having fun for real I don’t think about taking pictures. I laugh so hard with the homies I forget I have my phone.

All I know is I’m about to embark on the biggest and best chapter of my life and it will be a quieter time in my life. A new city new state and eventually I plan to live overseas. I have no intention of sharing the majority of it. I’m sure I’ll want to share some of it but as far as living on social media like I once did I’m done with that.

I guess I’ve gotten to a place of just wanting my privacy. I want my kids, my life, my man all too myself. I really don’t want him on social media but hey that’s something you can’t really force on people. I love to keep up with friends and family but that’s it the foolishness has got to go.

I realize that I’m not here to prove anything or be any one’s entertainment. I have a purpose and 4 little people GOD let me borrow and they’re only children once. I am and will be the most stable thing in their lives and that’s important. So as far as social media goes I’ll be on my business accounts but its time to take a few step back from the personal ones. After my move, I’ll probably fall completely off the face of the earth. I just really want to focus on my family and making our memories all our own!

 

 

 

 

 

What Really Matters

The picture you see above is a young woman her husband and their newborn child. A couple who were celebrating the birth of their 5th child together.Taken just 3 weeks ago it was one of the last she would take. A beautiful woman was called to heaven this past week at 36 years old. This woman’s name is Charity.

I never did anything more than sit in the same room with Charity but, her presence changed my life for the better. Charity has spent the last years of her life spreading the gospel of Jesus in Madagascar with her family. During this time Charity was diagnosed with cancer. Charity fought her cancer into remission but it returned to attack her body. During her second fight with the illness, Charity found out she was pregnant and was told by doctors to terminate the pregnancy. Charity was told her life would be cut short if she kept the baby. Her faith in GOD lead her to keep that child and, because of that selfless decision Charity left this world last week.

In her life and her passing Charity changed lives and inspired people. In her short 36 years, she was able to impact the world. Her departure from the world caused many questions in my mind. Why her? Why her family? Why not someone else? Why not me? I suffered greatly during my own pregnancy last year.The doctors told me several times that I could lose my own life having my daughter Ava. I had nurses at my home weekly I lost 30lbs and my ability to sit up or walk. Towards the end of my pregnancy, the pain was so unbearable that I would lay in bed with my mother and cry for hours. I had made up in my mind that I was ready to go but today I’m still here. Today I celebrate my 30th birthday and today Ava is 3 months old.

Today I am here and Charity is not. Although I have questioned GOD I know I don’t have that right. The only thing I know is that GOD doesn’t make mistakes. Charity fulfilled her purpose here and at the same time helped me search harder to find my own. Knowing her sacrifice I choose to make the most of my time here. What really matters are my children, my family and, living a life to serve others and spread the gospel.

Charity did that! So today I honor her and I pray her family will continue to see her harvest. I pray her children will one day feel and understand the legacy that their mother left here.  I pray that her husband finds peace.  Thank you, Charity for helping me to see that I’ve spent too much time on things that don’t matter at all.

R.I.H Charity Jertberg

Just Me!

FB_IMG_1456442808665I started writing this blog last July to be somewhat of a diary or a reminder of what was going on in my life at that time. Daily I would sit in front of my computer and type every feeling that I embodied at that time. Nine months later as I’m reading I thank GOD that I’m here and I’m healthy. My situation could have ended in 3 children losing their mother and sister or possibly 4 children without a mother. GOD lead me through the worst time in my life to be stronger than I was before.

I am a firm believer that GOD makes no mistakes, that the storm I endured was necessary in order for me to become who GOD needed me to be. For years I was holding onto demons that I refused to let GOD deliver me from. People who weren’t supposed to be in my life I couldn’t let go of.  Love of man had overshadowed my relationship with GOD. I thought an earthly relationship was somehow going to fix the things in me that were broken. I needed a wake-up call and I got it.

My prayer in all this is that my blog helps someone. So many people go through things with no outlet or support. People go through situations feeling alone or mad at GOD not realizing you can’t have a testimony without the test. How can you help someone if you’ve never been through anything? GOD never said you would have a life free of troubles you just need to trust him. Trust what HE is showing you and listen as HE speaks through hardships.

GOD wouldn’t put you in those situations if HE didn’t know for a fact you’d make it out with flying colors. I had to talk to GOD and ask HIM to show me what I needed to see so that I could be released and, in that season I learned who I was. My flaws and, all I felt GOD leading me towards a place of change. Internally I’ve ignored my issues with myself.

Ignoring them didn’t make them go away they only grew to be debilitating to my life and relationships. Moving forward I’m all about living praying and loving life just how it is. In this moment I love where I am the opportunities I’ve received and, most importantly I’m learning to love people for who they are. I wasn’t sure If I would ever get to a point where I would actually make my blog public but, now I think its time. The storm has passed and I feel better today than I’ve felt in a long time. Nothing in my life right now is how I planned it but, everything is how GOD intended it to be and I’m o.k with that. Just the fact that I made it through is fine with me.

Living My Dream! Starting my own company!

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I would say my 20’s were pretty interesting. I enjoyed opportunities working in the entertainment industry as a model, movie background and even tried music in a hip-hop group. God placed me in the perfect position to learn the business. Over the years I met a lot of people gained contacts and formed some pretty awesome relationships.

 From the time I was 3 years old, my parents were always told by family, friends, and strangers that I should be on T.v. Needless to say, I’m happy with the work I’ve done the past 27 years but now it’s my time to transition. I’ve officially become a momager! Well, I’ve been one for a few years but, this year I decided to take a full 12 months and work solely on my children’s careers.  I’m sure you’re thinking “everybody thinks their child has talent”, have you met Sophia?

My oldest child is a singer, songwriter who has worked in short films, feature films and this past year filmed her first commercial. My other children are right behind her with my youngest being selected for a promo campaign at 2 months old, my son Justin filmed his first commercial at 5 years old and my sweet Vanessa filmed her first short film at the tender age of 3. My children are already doing an amazing job.

So what better way to help them further their career than to focus on our love for the industry and to start my own business.  In April 2017 I will launch my talent management company FS Talent Management! I’m excited about all of our endeavors and my new talent Xiomara and Zara Peterson as well as Kaleb Wade.

I am thankful for my family and friends who believe in me and support me in this business venture. It’s not the easiest thing in the world to start a legitimate business. It takes time effort energy and most importantly money but, I believe God is leading me towards greatness.

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